Archive for the ‘ Everybody Panic! ’ Category

Just So You Know…

The Zombie Bite Calculator

Created by Oatmeal


I always thought I would have more time… I have so much more to do.

Photo courtesy of Phantoms & Monsters ( Used under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

It’s not enough that we have to worry about coyotes, timber rattlers and mountain lions when we’re out for a hike in Minnesota. Now this. Sheesh.

Oz: Not amused


A Mexican wolf was shot and killed after it got out of its enclosure at the Minnesota Zoo Wednesday morning.

Minnesota Zoo spokesperson Kelly Lessard said the wolf escaped and got out on to the Northern Trail, venturing over to the bison area. The area was evacuated, the wolf was located and then shot and killed.

No one was hurt in the incident.

A visitor at the zoo told WCCO she spotted the wolf on the walking path and used emergency box to call zookeepers.

Lessard said the safety of the visitors is their first concern, and because of the wolf’s proximity to people, it posed a “direct threat.”

Lessard said zoo officials are investigating how the wolf escaped.


Will Boys 12-and-Under Get in Free?

Dead molester

From the Pioneer Press:

The music of Michael Jackson meets the spectacle of Canadian circus troupe Cirque du Soleil in “Michael Jackson: The Immortal World Tour,” which hits the Target Center on March 27, 2012. … Jackson’s estate partnered with Cirque du Soleil to create the show, which promises “a riveting fusion of visuals, dance, music and fantasy that immerses audiences in Michael’s creative world and literally turns his signature moves upside down.”

Can’t believe how Americans are able to compartmentalize Michael Jackson the singer and Michael Jackson the serial child molester. Hey, Charles Manson was a pretty decent singer-songwriter. Think Cirque de So-Long will want to do a show based on his songs next year?

Hide your kids. Hide your wife

Turn and face the strange, ch-ch-chupacabra...

They found a chupacabra, the legendary “goat sucker,” in Kentucky. So, of course, they shot it.

Wonder what it tasted like?

This Could Save Your Life

From Yahoo! Movies:

Piling On

It must be Day to Disparage Newspapers (What are they?)

From one of my favorite new comics, Scenes from a Multiverse:


Hat tip to Charles Apple at and to Jim Romenesko at

What’d I Ever Do to Glenn Beck?

Christmas Makeovers

The girls got a bunch of makeup in their stockings today and had fun giving each other makeovers. I laughed until they threatened to give me a makeover. Now I cower in fear back in the office.